Tuesday, November 12, 2013

My name is... WHAT?!

Hi... My name is Andrew.

I don't know why... but for almost two years that little starting out intro has been stuck in my brain. Every time I think of going anything or saying anything to anyone or any group that matters that is the first idea I have. I usually go with it because it works. That is who I am... Andrew. What does Andrew mean... well that is another journey all together!!

My life hasn't always been what I wanted. Or I should say I don't always know what I want my life to be. What I want and what is sometimes still up for grabs... I am 30+ now and still really don't have much drive. I am not dedicated to anything strongly. I love and am loved and that is about all I generally need to keep myself in good shape. There are times when I get down and don't feel like things are going well. But most of the time that is when things are going so well that I feel out of place, literally out of ideas and out of things to fix in my personal life.

I am in one of those times. Good job, great girlfriend, money is in good shape, day to day is OK, and I am learning more every day than ever before. However... I still feel wrong. It is like the struggle of daily life makes me better than I am. Like just scraping and getting by makes me a better at being the person I really want to be. It seems to me that the complete picture of myself, Andrew, isn't really here right now. I am being lazy and my real self hates me because I am too comfortable. I remember the last time this happened... I made a bad choice and it has messed everything up ever since. The question now is what I am I going to do right now. What do I need to put forth the life chalenge to get me back in line.

Well the first step... a blog post... Check one off that list.

What should be next???